Sunday, October 31, 2010

Roots

Usually, this time of the year--sembreak/undas--I would be spending some days and nights inhaling fresh air, looking up at countless stars and shining moon, getting surrounded by high mountains, standing under clear blue skies, bathing on the waig (Ilocano of small rivers), walking on the pilapil, checking Lam-ang's footprint and just taking in the scenery. 

Where there are mountains, and mountains, and mountains. 
I'm supposed to be spending the holidays in my father's province, Abra of the Cordilleras. But well there's already work and what can I say to that? 

I just miss MY province. One great lesson that I learned from Papa is to pay homage. Sabi ng matatanda, ang hindi marunong lumingon sa pinanggalingan ay di makakarating sa paroroonan. My father really taught me the importance of returning to your roots. Even though my father stayed here in Manila for years, 30, almost 40 years, I know that he's home belongs to Abra, where he was raised as a child. He loves it very much that he's love to it passed down to me. Truly. 

I tell you, when I'm having vacation there, I feel at home. It's my second home. Everybody makes me feel that I belong there, and of course, you just won't get rid of the special treatment. Which of course, makes the vacation feel more like a vacation. 

I still have my childhood memories in Abra too. And I swear, no matter how old I get, I will go back and back again in Abra. Like Papa does. After all my father is born there and I wouldn't be born if he wasn't born there, most definitely! If Papa is born in Manila, he's life won't surely lead to me being his daughter if things are different from the beginning, see? So my existence has got to thank Abra. 

I do hope I get to enjoy a vacation on December though. :)

Reds and greens. 
I eat on a different house each meal and sleep on a different house each night. Not on this one though, my relatives houses are already made of cement, have electricity, videoke and running water. 
The balete tree that tells secrets and time. 
When there was no water. 
The land of the tabako
Papa looking comic.
And yet looking more comic!
Can't I just fly?
Ooops. ^^
The End.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Impasse

I think I'm entering an impasse, for 
the lack of words to say, 
the lack of thoughts to share, 
the lack of beliefs to fight for,
the lack of criticism to amuse,
the lack of genuis to gain,
the lack of smile to make,
the lack of courage to continue.


The end of the affair, if there was any. 


I think I might lose it. And I don't know if I'd like that.  

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Believing is as good as truth

I remember saying from my blog about Legends of the Guardians that "Legends are true even if you can't see it as long as your heart believes in it."

Then I also remember a short conversation with a friend. He said that some things are better felt than seen. I told him it's true. Adding that there are also things you don't need to see in order for you to know its existence. We therefore concluded that sometimes, feelings have more value than what you see in front of you.

The separate thoughts convey one meaning. It's quite simple. Believing is as good as truth. 

I think humans sometimes are so intent on finding tangible proofs of love, and care, and things that assure us of our existence in this world. I don't blame us though. We are vain and often afraid. 

However, our heart is never quiet on what it believes to be true. Something is true when it makes one happy, sad, excited, afraid, lost and even confused! Just feel, and then believe.

Now, let me tell you the things I believe. The things in which I disregard science and in which I give a blind eye on the facade. 

I believe in God, I do not see Him. But he's the truest Being that lives inside my heart. 

I believe in past life. I believe I had been a creature of the great seas before. I just feel it every time I'm in water. I love swimming, though I am not a trained swimmer. Maybe I was a plankton before, a freefloater.   

I believe my cat understands me when I talk to him. Animals return our feelings. They love us back when we show affection. The harm us when we mean danger. 

I believe in ghosts. I am forever afraid of the supernatural, especially when they visit me during my sleep and give me nightmares.

I believe I am beautiful and kind. 

I believe someone is loving me out there, and that someone will spend the rest of his life with me. 

Oh well, I don't know how the heck this ended cheesy. HAHA! XD

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Junnel Diwata: A boy without a voice

Author's Note: Junnel Diwata has undergone the preliminary examinations and as of this time, he only needs financial assistance to be operated, be able to speak again after the operation. Any amount will do. Please donate. Let's all have the heart to bring happiness back to the life of Junnel. 

I also want to thank one of Times editor for doing a superb job with this article. This is the uncut version of the published story. Photos by Jessie Laureta. 


The tube on Junnel's neck needs to be replaced so that he can speak again. 

Imagine yourself not being able to speak. Just the thought of it is enough to scare someone. True, one can communicate in other ways—sign language, jotting messages on a piece of paper, even facial expressions and body language—but there is something about the voice that conveys not just words, but also emotions. “Thank you”, “I’m sorry”, “I love you”—these common phrases come across much more effectively when spoken.


12-year-old Junnel Diwata of Makati City would love to say these and more to his mother Marilyn, who works as a saleslady at a cellphone loading station, and grandmother Edita Queras, who drives a tricycle for a living. Unfortunately, he can’t, and not because he is mute. It is because he has a tube attached to his neck.

How did he end up with it?

According to Queras, Junnel was only five when he started having breathing difficulties. She added that because their family is poor, his frequent gasping fits were often ignored.

But one such fit had Junnel almost turning black from lack of air. Frightened by his condition, Marilyn and Queras brought him to the Makati Medical Center (MMC). There, doctors diagnosed him with severe inflammation and obstruction of the larynx—the voice box—which is located in the neck and houses the vocal chords.

Doctors weren’t too optimistic: they gave Junnel a 50/50 chance for survival and promptly placed him in intensive care. Miraculously, he pulled through, but not without scars: the damage to his larynx was so bad that he underwent direct laryngoscopy and tracheoscopy, in which a tracheostomy tube was attached to his throat. As a result, he couldn’t produce intelligble words—only muffled sounds—every time he tries to talk.

Even worse, he no longer breathes through his nose or mouth, but through the tube itself.
Junnel (left) and Lola Edita. 

Struggling to survive
Queras recalled how difficult it was—is—for them to get the money for Junnel’s continued treatment. She explained that they have to produce around P3,000 every time his tube needs to be replaced, adding that she often had to borrow money for it, since she only earns between P300 to P400 a day.

She also feels obligated to feed Marilyn, whose drug-addicted and often jobless husband abandoned her last year, and her six children. Sometimes, she and her tricycle driver-husband—when he’s not sick—hand their earnings to them even if it means having nothing for themselves.

Queras clearly loves Junnel. She related how she mad she gets whenever her other grandchildren make fun of him. “Nasasaktan ako. Nagagalit ako [I feel hurt. I get mad],” she said. On one such occasion, she had snapped: “Paano kung kayo kaya ang nasa kalagayan niya [What if you were in his place]?”

Sana bago magpantay ang mga paa ko, makita ko siyang magsalita [I hope I get to see Junnel talk again before half of my feet are buried in the ground],” she said.

Back to school
The tube not only cost Junnel his voice, but also the chance to continue his education.

Queras told The Manila Times that he stopped going to school six, seven years ago—he was a Grade One student at the time—because “inaaway siya ng mga kaklase niya [his classmates pick fights with him].” She added that sometimes he would just sit in a corner, while at other times he would fight back. The family then decided that he would stop attending classes just to avoid the bullying.

But last year, he let his grandmother know that he wants to study again.

At first, Queras asked the F. Benitez Elementary School—Junnel’s former school—if he can come back. The school refused to accept him again. She then went to a deaf-mute school, which also refused because it said that her grandson is not mute. 

Ever determined, she then asked the Department of Education for help in this matter. Thanks to the department’s intervention, Junnel’s former school eventually readmitted him. However, Queras described his enrolment as “saling pusa” because he has no formal school records.

Returning as a Grade One student, his current classmates now call him kuya [big brother] because he’s the eldest in class. But he doesn’t mind: he still enjoys school. In fact, he is also considered the teacher’s pet because he often helps out the class adviser. 
Ida Rafols (from left), Junnel, Lola Edita, and me doing the interview. 

Angels on earth
Glad as Queras is that Junnel is studying again, she knows that they cannot entirely shoulder his medical expenses. On June 22, 2009, the MMC estimated that an operation—one that will enable him to speak again—that includes direct laryngoscopy with dilation of tracheal stenosis and tracheobronchospy, shall cost about P28,700. Plus, the accompanying medication shall amount to about P13,600. 

She then went to the Philippine Charity Sweepstakes Office (PCSO) for assistance in this regard. But she realized that the PCSO’s requirements will only compel them to spend more money, thus forcing her to drop the matter altogether.

Fortunately, someone took notice of Junnel’s plight: Rotary Club of Makati North (RCMN) volunteer Ida Rafols learned about him during one of the feeding programs sponsored by the organization at his school.

Moved by his situation, Rafols had Junnel brought to the Philippine General Hospital (PGH) instead of the MMC. Since then, she and his family went to his check-ups together. She sometimes even uses her own money to pay for the consultations if Marilyn and Queras found themselves short on cash. 

During one such check-up, the RCMN volunteer related to The Times that that she couldn’t forget how Junnel smiled when the doctor told them he could speak again despite the tube attached to his throat. 

Indeed, Rafols has taken the first step in realizing Junnel’s wish to speak again. But he needs more people like her—like you—for that to happen. He needs good, generous people who are willing to shoulder the costs of his operation. The reward shall be priceless: hearing a once-voiceless boy finally say “I love you” to his mother and grandmother and a heartfelt “thank you” to those who helped him—and that may include you.

For those who wish to donate, please do so through the Rotary Club of Makati North’s current account (account number: 00123 001515 5) at Union Bank’s SSS Ayala Branch.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

I am a dreamer

Because when I sleep
All I wanna do is dream
Open my eyes
Why do I have to be so mean?

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

I Have Friends in Holy Spaces by Panic! at the Disco

*let's sing.

You remind me of a former love
that I once knew
And you carry a little piece with you
(It's true that I see a part of him in you. It's your fervent passion! It's the way some mighty ideal drives you to live, and fight, and just believe. And more than that, do you know that I see a part of me in you?)

We were holding hands walking through the middle of the street
And it's fine with me
I'm just taking in the scenery
(And once again, let Divine hands decide. Let me wonder in this lovely and sometimes thorny fields. Because I am not afraid anymore. I am willing to risk even if you'll let go of my hands.)

You remind me of a few of my famous friends
Well that all depends what you qualify as friends
(Yes, since when did we become friends? It's really funny remembering)

Take a chance take your shoes of dance in the rain
And I was splashing around
When the news spread all over town
I'm not complaining that it's raining
I'm just saying that I like it a lot more than you think
If the sun will come and sing with me
(Whatever, whatever happens, I am hoping, that after the rain, the sun will tell me I am a better person. If this is not it, I am still willing to dance in another rain.)

You remind me of a few of my famous friends
Well that all depends what you qualify as friends
(And when I find him, I'll proudly say, I did not stop searching.


Author's Note: I don't know since when I became a hopeless romantic. I love this song of PATD. Gosh how it translates into song my feelings. ^^V 

Monday, October 11, 2010

Too Cute and Done

After the much long wait, after I gathered too much anticipation, and after I suppressed too much excitement, finally the opening of Legends of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole arrived!


You know how ecstatic I felt? But I did not watch it during the opening. Hehe I was fortunate enough that I have a job now and got money to spend. And by the way! I treated my mother as well, as a post-birthday present. 


So there I was, in a 3D cinema of Ayala malls, watching as the legends of the owls unfold. And as I watched Soren--the main barn owl character--realize and make real the myths of the Guardians of Ga'hoole, I myself realize that all was unfolding, "all too fast!"


Yep, the plot is that Soren, as a "teen" owl has heard from his father the legends of the guardians that brought light during dark times. Him and his "baby" sister love the stories well, but more than that, in his heart, he believes that the guardians are real! Until one day, he and his brother, Klud, was kidnapped by a group of owls. These owls turned out to be the "pure ones" or Tytos, who was the evil group of owls in the myths. During their captivity, Soren meets elf owl Gylfie. 


Then Soren and Gylfie escaped through the help of Borreal, their own captor. They have to find Guardians of Ga'hoole to save the Owl Kingdom from destruction. Kludd did not come with them, he was influenced by the ways of the Tytos. 


Then Soren and Gylfie met burrowing owl Digger and great gray owl Twilight. Soren caught up with Mrs. Plithiver, her nanny too. All took the journey towards the great open sea to reach the Great Tree where the guardians live.


Then all of the sudden, the long journey--that was so much highlighted on the trailers--came to end! They were close to giving up when suddenly, the guardians came to their rescue. Soren, found the Tree, and the guardians.


Time passes by and all of a sudden, Soren was fighting with the Tytos, and the one saving the guardians! His fight with his brother in which an accident--not Soren--will kill Kludd. He also defeated the King of Tytos. 


The movie ends with Soren, of course, as the hero! Hooray! 


I do hope that my plot made sense. I really tried not to make it so much of a spoiler.


But I have more bad things to say, rather than good. Awww! 


It's just that I thought that the story went too fast. It was not developed in a way that the audience will get to the edge of their seats as they wait for the peak to arrive. And to literally fall on their seat as they watch the climax. It was like walking trough a flat plane all throughout. It was always the same level of emotion, whether during the "cute" periods, the long "journey,"  the "fight" scenes. The only time that i get to WHOA is during the mighty intervention of 3D effects.


See, the 90-minuter something film is not enough to say, portray the book itself. Yes, the film is based on a series of novels by Kathryn Lasky. Though I have not read the book, I still feel that it was TOO short. Like for example, the long journey towards the Great Tree could have been detailed more in a way that the audience really felt the desperateness, the hopelessness, the giving up on the belief that the guardians are true, but Soren will be able to keep his team believing, pushing them closer to their goal. I am quite sure it's like this in the book. 


Also, the battle between good and evil should have been blown up a little more. I also felt like the main battle came without warning. 


I really wanted the film to be worth it's cost, and more importantly worth the anticipation and the excitement I felt over it. I was saying repeatedly over myself that "there must be more, it's not ending like that." But it did. It ended just that. 


On the positive note, I still think that owls are too cute, way cute. So in five owl ratings, I'd give the film three, considering the cost, the cuteness, and the nice story that just did not deliver well.


Allow me to finish by sharing something I loved about the film--Legends are true even if you can't see it as long as your heart believes in it.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Theater - bridging communities and defining culture

Author's Note: This is an article originally published at The Manila Times. However, this is the raw and uncut version, ika nga. :) Follow the link to read the other version. :) 


Theater is not just entertainment anymore. It is an art that can bridge communities and culture. 

This is the message stated loud and clear on Thursday’s (September 23) back-to-back activities sponsored by Asia Society Philippine Foundation Inc. and Lark Play Development Center. The first of two the events, called “Breaking Through Barriers Panel Discussion,” was led by international playwrights whom through their companies in the United States have produced theater plays that addressed Asian communities. 

While the second event, “Meet the Writers Reception,” was attended by Filipino and American playwrights. It was highlighted by award-winning playwright David Henry Wang who gave a speech to the eager theater enthusiasts and practitioners. 

Strength is communities
The Breaking Through Barriers Panel Discussion speakers were Kate Leowald, founding producer of Play Co.; Jorge Ortoll, executive director of Ma-Yi Theater Co.; and John Eisner, producing artistic director of 
Lark Play Development Center. 

“The strength of theater is its community,” said Eisner. He said that in our world today that is already so huge, people need to find the value in the small identifying it to be the minor communities existing along the majority. Theater can do so by translating Asian scripts and producing it to foreign audiences. This is an example for both Lark and Play companies. 

Ortoll, who is a veteran in the Filipino theater scene, on the other hand, tells that Ma-Yi Theater have produced plays about the Filipino-American society in the US for years. They also have a roster of American playwrights with Asian origins. 


Language barrier 
Pastrano asked the speakers how is it possible for communities to showcase their theater plays if language is already a barrier.

Both Ortoll and Eisner believed that actions and purpose delivers the message of the play. Ortoll gave as example the play Ma-Yi has produced in Romania that had Tagalog and Ilocano script. He said the Romanian audience got the meaning of the play. He added, “Language is important but it does not make or break the success of a play in a foreign country.”


For Leowald, she said the multilingual plays have become a trend nowadays and that it should be practiced more. One time Play Company had produced a multilingual play, she said the audience had a good time, but the critics had not.

Excerpts
 

At the Meet the Writers Reception held at the Ayala Museum in Greenbelt 5 Makati City, both Filipino and American playwrights showcased their talents as actors read full of emotions excerpts from their scripts.
Filipino playwrights from Writers Bloc who presented on the event were Layeta Bucoy, Vincent de Jesus and Mariane Mixkaela Villalon. Meanwhile, Floy Quintos, also a Filipino playwright has directed, written and conceptualized cultural plays.


Lloyd Suh is and American playwright who has produced plays off Broadway with Ma-Yi Theater and Play Company. His part of his play American Hwangap was performed by Ana Valdez.


The much-awaited performance though came for David Henry Hwang’s M. Butterfly. First produced in the year 1988, it is about a French diplomat having an affair with a Peking opera diva which 20 years later will be revealed as a man masquerading as “drag queen.”


The play was highly praised and popularized even here in the Philippines. It has won Tony Award for Best Play in 1988 and was nominated for Pulitzer Award for Best Drama in 1989. Filipino actors Richard Cunanan, Jeremy Domingo and Jomarie Jose read the confrontation scene in which Rene Gallimard found out that Shi Pei Pu’s true sexuality was a man.

Define, assert culture
 

On Hwag’s speech, he gave his techniques in writing his plays. He identified two instances in the process.

The first instance—“I hear the play read,” he said. He added that some say that writing plays are like writing novels, but for him it is more like writing music. He comes to know more of the play when he hears it on air and not just see it on paper.


The second instance—“The first time I watch the play performed in front of an audience,” Hwang added. For him audience is very rarely wrong. He gets to see how they feel once watching his plays and he gets to understand his play more. He also adds that if the audience did not get the play, they are not the problem. It is the play that has some problem in it.


He tells that the process in writing plays is messy but the as long as a writer has even just a bit of an agenda, plays may help a nation, a community to define and assert a culture. Aspiring young playwrights may do so by showcasing through their plays the unique and beautiful identity of the Philippines and teach the audience to assert their roles and place in the world.


He finished by saying that playwrights have to make their plays produced no matter what.